Another Ghost Tale

10/16/22 

I hope you have enjoyed my stories…they’re all true 😉  These are little ones that were experienced by me over the years.

I don’t like thunderstorms. Ever since I was small,they scared me. It seems that when I was very very young, lightning struck our house.Now I don’t remember anything but the leftover fear of lightning. There’s been times when I wanted to hide with my dogs. 

My dad knew this and he would tease me about it. I am not going to say wonderful things about him as if he was a perfect father because he wasn’t. As I grew up, he and I spent more time together. He loved deer hunting and one time I was “allowed” to go along. Not that I was into killing because I never have been. However, I Do enjoy the results. Instead of a rifle, I took my little Brownie camera. We were walking down an old logging trail, when my dad suddenly stopped. He was looking to his right and I peeked around him to see what had stopped him. In a small clearing stood a gorgeous 8-point buck. My dad whispered “ do not move”… he  slowly lifted his rifle up, and took aim. I was closer than I wanted to be as gunfire is LOUD. I stood as still as a statue and waited. I heard him pull the trigger, then I heard a click. Of course the buck leaps sideways and into the bushes he went. My dad smacked his rifle and fired again, but it was too late. Me, not sure being into killing, had my eyes squished shut tight. When I heard the click, my dad started cussing.( we later nicknamed him Cussing’ Jim) . Ohhhh he cussed a blue streak. The deer was in Elkton before it slowed down, I’m sure.

But, I digress… My husband and I lived a short distance from my parents so it was just a short walk for a visit. Every time a big storm was heading up the Chesapeake Bay, my dad (retired at that point) would invite me to come have a cup of coffee or some such excuse so I didn’t have to be alone.Or he would stop in for a visit until the storm was gone.

After he had died, I missed him a lot. We had become pretty good friends towards the end of his life.

One miserable, hot afternoon, shortly after his death, I was sitting in my little kitchen hearing the thunder rolling in the distance. I was not going to be scared…after all, I was an adult and shouldn’t be scared of lightning. The clouds were beginning to make the sky darker as they always do in a storm. I figured I had better close my windows. The last one was the big double window in the kitchen. I leaned out to wind them shut and I saw my dad walking down the little path to the house. I was surprised to see him as you can well imagine. As I watched him go by, he faded away. My dad was making sure that I was not going to be scared of the lightning. If I close my eyes, I can still see him, in his white tee shirt and  khaki pants .

More Ghosts

 I have been seeing/hearing from ghosts since I was a kid. I never saw them as scary or trying to scare me. I always understood that they were on a journey to say goodbye to people they had loved, or get unfinished things accomplished. Some ,l discovered, didn’t even know that they were dead. Of course, I didn’t know how to help, so I would grin and shrug my shoulders. 

I was married when I saw my first ghost and knew it. One day I was at the barn finishing up my morning chores. My husband and I had built the barn and house together ( with a lot of help.)  It was a small row barn with 4 stalls. We used one for storage and it had a nice tack room ; just enough for my Appaloosa horses. I loved it.One morning , as I was finishing the last stall, I heard my Dalmation barking. I stepped outside to see what was going on but didn’t see anything. All of a sudden, a man stepped into view. He smiled and waved to me. Not to be rude, I asked if I could help him. He said that he had been hunting in the State Forest and managed to get all turned around. It was rifle season after all … hunters continuously got lost .I asked him about his gun and had told me that he had put it down as he didn’t want to scare me. Ooooookaaaay. He asked me if I could direct him towards a certain road because that’s where he had parked his pickup.He had on a red plaid flannel shirt and jeans. The weather had not gotten to cold yet and he sure looked like he’d been walking awhile. Happy to see him gone, I told him what he had to head to find his pickup again. He thanked me and started walking down the driveway to get his gun. When he picked it up, he waved and yelled ‘thanks again.’ 

I went back to my chores and didn’t think much about the whole thing. Lost hunters wandered on to our farm being lost a lot anymore. People from out of the area got lost in the State Forest all the time, so it wasn’t unusual.

Later on in the evening when we were done with dinner, I settled down to read the local newspaper. It was getting cold finally…I remember thinking that I would have to get winter blankets for the horses from the big storage trunk.I decided to check the front page news and see what had happened that week. I was shocked to read an article about a hunter who had deer hunting and had accidentally killed himself. He apparently had been in a deer stand when he was getting down, he’d dropped his rifle. It hit the ground in such a way that it must’ve fired. These were mere suppositions because he’d been hunting alone. It was so terrible and I felt awful for his family. 

All of a sudden, I gasped! There was a photo of the same man who had been at my barn this morning.. Yet the news article reported that he had died the night before , when another hunter found him.

. Go figure…..

Ghosts?!

10.7.22

How many believe in Ghosts? I know I sure do. Many people think that they are always scary and out to make people terrified. Well, there are many who don’t want that. There’s the wicked ghosts that follow some people and try to make life miserable or so incredibly frightening that people think they are going crazy. But some are “stuck” midway between the living world and the dead; some don’t realize that they have died. There might be visits from a ghost who didn’t get to say goodbye because they died an instant death. These have been my experiences…. 

My early memories of ghosts began when I was in my 20s. There could have been some earlier but I didn’t realize that I had been visited by a ghost.  I had met a guy so very long ago who became a first true love. Only he never knew… the attraction was there but nothing ever happened. We both went our ways ..I got married and he was moving from one gal to the next. Years later, I was working at a racing barn ( thoroughbred racehorses) in a nearby town and had volunteered for the morning coffee run. I was not looking my best,like many people who work in horse barns. After putting my order in, I sat down on one of the stools at the little counter to wait. I could hear miscellaneous bits of conversations but ignored them. 

All of a sudden I was grabbed from behind and spun around on my stool. It was the guy that I had adored many years before. Turns out that we were both single and that he had to head back to work. Later that week he called me and we got together for dinner. And so it went….

 One day in June I had just gotten home from work and my phone rang. There was no internet nor cellphones then. This was a real telephone that was hung on a wall in the kitchen. I could not take photos with it, and gosh, all it would do is deliver calls. Turns out that the caller was a dear friend who I had known in school. He and “ my guy “ were also friends. He was the bearer of bad news. There’d been an accident earlier in the morning and my guy had died. Sitting in complete shock, it hit me that around 2AM that morning I had gotten a phone call from him. He always called me “Krissi”and wanted to know if I could “ come out to play “ meaning that he wanted for me to meet at the bar where he was.Well I needed to be up at 5 AM for work and replied no , I had to work later on. We said our see ya laters, and I went back to sleep. 

That’s the thought that hit me like I had hit a wall. If I had gotten up at least to make sure he had gotten home safely, or had driven to get him and took him to my place….. what IFFFF….For  years later I have dealt with those “What ifsss” …

 The next week was a blur. I don’t remember much of it at all. A dear childhood friend has also been killed in a head on crash and down I went again. It was almost to much to handle. Viewings and funerals ,like I mentioned, it was stress overload. I held it together until I was waiting in line to give my condolences to my friend’s family and lost it. The tears would not stop and I couldn’t stop sobbing I’m grief. I survived though it didn’t feel like I would right then. 

Passing through the days in a glaze of sadness I realized I might survive this torture. One night about a week later, I was awoken by the sound of someone in my little house. I was upstairs in my loft with no way to get to a door for exit. So I grabbed a quilt, thinking that I would throw it down on the burglar , then dash through the door. That’s the only plan I could come up with in the middle of the night. 

   My little Finnish flag was knocked over from my fireplace mantle. I clearly heard footsteps from the kitchen and the living room. So I waited for a good moment and made my move. Over the loft that quilt went, down the ladder I went and I had the sliding door open when I noticed there was no one there. Glancing at the clock ( don’t know why) and saw it was 2: 10 AM . Almost the exact time that my love would have been driving home..A kitchen chair slid out and someone sat down. The cigarette ashtray moved over to the chair and I saw smoke coming from it. All of a sudden I knew. I relaxed and said “ why hello Charlie “ . It was almost like the whole little house was enveloped in a warm hug. I knew it was him. Not quite sure what to say, I stood there. A few seconds later, there was a noise behind me. I turned to see what the noise was and there was a flying squirrel!  In my house! It sat down on the coffee table and looked at me. Grabbing a kitchen towel, I figured that I would have to chase it so I could put it back outside. No…. It quietly waited for me to pick it up from the table. Outside we went…with me, sitting it down gently on the deck. Of course the little squirrel jumped to the nearest tree and was gone.

Still in a daze of big surprises, I stepped back inside. As I did, the smoke from the cigarette was snuffed out, the chair slid out, my front door opened and closed as though someone had gone. My little house was quiet again.. That’s when my tears started flowing.

I knew that I had been visited by a ghost that was saying goodbye to me … to make sure that I would be okay. I never actually saw a shape or form that let me know who it was, but I didn’t need to. Doing some research later on that day, I learned that spirits who needed to say goodbye would visit again the place they felt most welcomed and at ease. Every so often I would hear from him, starting with my Finnish flag flying off the mantle and the same warm hugs and I know that he’s still watching over me. 

AWOL

10/7/2022

Yes, that would be me. Massive apologies for not keeping up with my life online. No excuses but I had to deal with things that I never thought I would have to. I don’t know how much I have allowed to be public but I had an awful time being divorced. The divorce itself was not bad, but prior to that, life was pretty terrible. I won’t go into it much but the end result is that I got the proverbial short end of the stick. Should I have fought for more of what should have been my share of the sale of the farm? I should have, I realize that now. Back then, there was no way I was mentally able to keep moving forward, let alone have enough money and the mental capacity for a big court fight. 

He took everything materially that was a huge part of me and my life and it almost crushed me. My horse business was slowly torn down, the horses that I adored eventually became old and left me, one by one. I was told that I was not to have any more horses. That when the farm was sold, “We” were going to buy a small house very close to where he grew up and my sweet Briana would be boarded somewhere. Very involved story short, I decided that I was not going to be going along with that idea and moved out. I learned much later how I had been dealing with a narcissist.

 I had to sell Briana this past Spring as I couldn’t afford to care for her the way she (and all animals) deserved to be cared for. She was sold to a pal of mine and as far as I know, Briana is fine. Sometimes I wake up in the morning and think I have to get busy and get the AM chores done. But… I have no chores to do. 

During all this time, I was also scammed. When it first started, I knew Nothing about things like this. Sure, I knew about phone scams, but men who said all the right things and made others believe their sweet words? I had No Idea. I was a horsewoman and not aware of sickos who lied and basically stole money from others. It turns out that there were women who did the same thing. To write this now is embarrassing for me. I am a smart person… not some silly woman who falls in love with someone she never met. But I did. It was the worst time in my life that I ever had to deal with and I guess I was a perfect person to steal from. Since all of this happened, I have learned that a lot of women have been scammed. It isn’t that they are little old ladies but to have one’s emotions played by a professional thief who knows what to say and do to entice these women to send money to them. 

So, the past few months and years have been incredibly difficult to get through. Did I make wise choices?  No, I didn’t. I made some amazingly stupid ones. I have been facing bad situations and have dealt with them. I have healed and I am stronger than ever. My trust level is non-existent now and it’s going to be a long time before I blindly trust anyone, especially men. In no way do I blame all men, but I sure pay attention to what they say now.  Will I ever trust enough to give my heart? Maybe so, but it’ll be a while.

So! That’s what I have been doing for the past so many months and years. I am back… maybe not the exact same woman I was before all of this began. I am wiser and more willing to call it “bullshit” when I hear it. I’m a stronger, smarter woman than I ever was before.

I promise you that I won’t be so long in between posts. Some might even be funny! 

💜💙❤️💜💙❤️💜💙❤️💜💙❤️💜🤗🤗💜❤️💙💜❤️💜❤️💙🤭🫣💜💙

The Saga of the House that Moved

 3.10.22

 A very long time ago, I was married to a guy who wanted to have his own business. The trouble was that we were poor as church mice; you know, patches on our already patched jeans? 

 I already had my horse business and it was supporting itself alright but he thought that if he could get better at horse equipment and tack repair, he could make a go of it. We talked it out and decided to give it a try. He started learning more all the time and also saving whatever extra money we had... and one day a couple of months later he came home all but bursting with his news

He had found a building for his Tack Shop!!!  There was an old house there also and the deal was that he had to tear the old house down, remove it all, and the little crookedy building sitting there too, was his for free.  Umm, that was a problem right away. How would he be able to do it all? I was busy with my horses and couldn't be of much help...  No to worry, he'd come up with something, I was told.

Turns out he DID. He found some guys that were carpenters and out of work until Spring -many of them! These were all pals of his and he knew they were good workers, knowing their trade. They worked all through late winter on tearing that old house down, saving the old timbers, boards, and anything they could. Those all were hauled to our place and piled carefully so as not to warp or rot. We ended up with quite a big salvage pile of wood.

I stopped one afternoon to take a look and thought, 

"Oh myyyyy, that dear little building - a strong wind would knock it down"  

It was listing to the left, pieces of the roof gone and the old tarpaper was all but gone, exposing the boards. Broken window panes and a hole in the floor where there'd been a small fire at one time.  Sighing to myself, I drove home. 

 Finally, it was moving day. They didn't realize they needed permits or more to move an old building. They didn't realize there were electric and phone lines stretching across some of the roads. They didn't realize how rickety that little building was.  It seems they didn't realize many things when it came to moving a 100-year-old building...

Everyone was eager to get this show on the road. A fellow owned a big flatbed trailer with a truck to pull it. This wasn't a pick-up and a trailer- but one of those rigs that roll along on highways. Jussssst a little taller than expected. It was finally loaded and I remember one of them saying " I hope it doesn't die on the way"...   

The truck, trailer, and little old house pulled onto a major thoroughfare, and off they went. Pieces of shingles flew off, leaving a tell-tale sign of travel.  When they got off the main road, they intelligently traveled the back roads. This took a little more time but was worth it. Slower, less wind, and less traffic. Yes- this might work.

I had a late start and just followed the trail of ancient shingles along the roads traveled. It was a little funny as I felt like the story of Hansel and Gretel - following the shingle path to find my way. By the time I got home, there it was. Barely intact but still standing up. Not only was the big rig there and all of the other vehicles, but two police cars also. 

Hmmmm...The little ancient building was slid down the ramps and onto the footing that had already been installed a week before. It turns out that the building would not sit level for anything. That was when the leftover electric poles were brought over. Each was measured carefully and then cut. It turns out that my husband thought ahead concerning ending up with a crookedy base. He'd put buckets in the concrete so that when the concrete was set up, there was room to add poles if needed. 'Pretty smart!', I thought. So- back up the ramps the building was pushed...  I know those guys slept well that night as it wasn't a teeny little place - more like 12'x18' or so. It was big enough though.  After much grunting and shoving it stayed where it had been put. 

Things were all measured another time to be sure those large poles (now looking like stumps) were placed in those holes and then the little building was slid on top of them I was Amazed. 

It looked quite proud to be sitting on a safe dry foundation. If I scrunched my eyes almost closed, I swore the little building smiled. More fresh concrete was mixed and stones were found and eventually? That little building was all but perfectly level and sturdy. I was sure I heard it give a big sigh upon settling in.

All this time, the police stayed. On the way to the building's new home, it took out a few wires that were across the back roads, and then there was that 'no permit' problem. Luckily the two policemen were local and not as stuffy as some could be. The husband got a fine for not having a moving permit and no signal flag on the trailer.  As far as those wires went- being an electrician, he knew some guys and they got them all replaced asap. Everyone shook hands, and the police turned down the beers that'd been offered and drove away.

We had hotdogs cooked on the little grill we had, and of course, the beers flowed easily. I had my usual water and oh those grilled hot dogs tasted so good! 

 The next day I found the husband standing outside in the yard... just looking at his 'new to him' Tack Shop. Oh, he had a lot of plans on how to make it look like an old-fashioned shop- with a potbelly stove, and more. We worked on that little building for many months, saved money, ordered some pieces of tack that we thought people would enjoy owning, and a wonderful old wooden workbench for the repairs of bridles, and halters to create new leather pieces for customers who wanted something specially made for them.

 Finally, it was all ready and some horse-oriented friends stopped by to see what it became and I think they all liked it a lot. It was still there when I sold that little place, and I wonder if it still is now?  Maybe a drive to check it out is in order...

This is something similar to how it turned out but a little different. I will have to find a true photo of it and if I can, I'll add it here. Imagine the back section gone and that's pretty much how it looked. All of the leftover shingles were gone and a new roof had been installed and the front porch was on the original too/

(Credits to pioneer village at shingle creek, Fla. James C photo)

"All The Best"

 2.5.22

One more for this evening... I was sort of looking for another horse to use for teaching riding lessons. That sounds as though the ones I had in the past had been all used up and sold. Not so.

I only would buy a horse when I absolutely saw a big need for it.   A pal of mine mentioned that she'd seen a nice smaller App mare for sale in a horse paper. I called and lo n' behold- the mare was located in Illinois! She was older, in foal, and had bloodlines like crazy.  Top, foundation lineage- almost regal in heritage. The owner was super- she sent me photos, and a short video of this mare, and wrote over and over again how marvelous this little mare was. She was great on trails, had been to the Appaloosa Worlds twice in youth classes- western pleasure, English pleasure- even some little 'jumps'. It seems they had purchased a stallion that was too close in genetics to this mare and she was for sale...

 I discussed it with the husband and as usual, he said that if I thought it was a good horse- go for it.  I put $500 down and we tried to figure out a good weekend to drive out to pick her up.

 We decided on the weekend in the middle of September that year, It turns out it was the first weekend after 9/11 hit... We decided it would be alright and headed out towards Illinois. I took my American Bulldog, Petey, along with us as I didn't want to put him in a kennel for the weekend and it was also a good way to get him used to riding in the truck.

We had an uneventful trip out, but it was a huge event! Every overpass we went under, there were American flags (from small ones being waved to HUGE ones hung or held so all could see). There were flags waving from the back of pick up trucks, out the windows of cars and motorcycles!  Oh- the bikes... Burly tattooed guys riding in large groups, lights flashing, and yes, American flags on each one. It was just wonderful to see it all! Most of the exits had flags hanging below each marker.  All of the interstates were all but covered w/ American Flags, signs of support, and caring for those that died when the Twin Towers were destroyed. Sadly, I had not thought to bring a camera- we were driving to pick up a horse and I'd already seen what she was like. It wasn't long before I wished I had.

We arrived pretty much on time and I realized that place was not as I'd been led to believe. Old buildings- trying their best to fall down. Very little in the way of manure pick up and pieces of binder twine used to hold wire fencing together. The horses all looked terrific though, which gave me hope. I saw a gorgeous colored colt in a sort of stall- and was told that it was " Alli's" foal from the year before. Omg- he was Beautiful!! She took me to see the stallion that Alli had been bred to- and I was not happy. He was pony-sized, black w/ a big blanket. I was told that he'd been starved as a youngster and had been stunted.  Nodding, I thought- okay, that makes sense. He was a sweetie - personality-wise.  :)  

I asked where the mare was and the owner pointed to a raggedy thin brown mare with one eye standing in the muck.  Oh lordy- what did I buy!!?? I walked over to her and realized her right eye was completely gone and had been stitched together properly. She wasn't shy around me at all, which was great. This little mare- even with the crud on her, shaggy winter coat leftovers, a badly trimmed set of hooves, and one eye would look much better once she was in Maryland. She was incredibly sweet too. I got horse snuggles, and 'kisses' on my shirt plus she began 'telling' me about who she was and had been at one time. I was falling in love with her even before she had a halter on. I told her 'Come on, old mare' and she followed right behind me. In fact, I imagine I'd not have needed a halter to load her. I put a fly mask on her so if something flew in our trailer, her eyes, um, eye... would be protected. We did the money thing, I got her papers signed over to me and the 'in foal' forms, and off we went.

 Petey had been wanting to get out to do his afternoon walk but I didn't feel comfortable letting him out until we were quite a distance away. Wow, was he ever grateful!! He was such a wonderful puppy the whole trip- ate his food, drank weird-tasting water, and did his bathroom things - I was very proud of him! 

We stopped a few times on the trip home and Alli was such a good traveler I wasn't concerned about her having problems.  When we'd take a break to let her rest, I'd get some water for her, and open the trailer door only to be greeted by a soft nicker... 

 I was in love, no doubt about it. For almost 20 years, I'd raised, trained, and shown Appaloosa horses and Alli once again had opened my heart up to those spotty-bodied horses.

Cleo and the Cat

 2.5.22

For what seems like forever, Cleo has been the self-assigned cat nanny. She keeps a close eye on Simone - why? I haven't a clue but I guess she wants to know where Simone is every second so Simone doesn't " do wrong things"???? Simone doesn't do wrong things except threaten to attack my brother-in-law... She's a friendly, happy little cat. I imagine out of sheer boredom, she now chases Cleo, when Cleo is a PITA. A lot of "rules" from such a small cat!

In order to keep Cleo from making my happy little cat crazy, I throw a tennis ball of her choice constantly... Like every 30 minutes. Once we 'take a break' - she drops that ball on my foot so we can once again play 'fetch'. These balls are quite slimy as you can guess. Right now, Cleo is sitting in the doorway, holding her front paw up, looking like Lassie as best she can. Also, to get my attention, yes, once again we can have a rip-snorting game of fetch. Seems Cleo is the fetch mentality Border Collie and not the herding type.

This morning, I was begged into yet another game of fetch and while I want it to be a fun game, I hate making her 'waaaaait' to go after that ball. What happens is she'll come dashing back to wherever I threw it from, slimy ball in mouth, drop it, and nearly before I've even picked it up, she's galloping off to where she *thinks* I will throw it.

I picked the slimy ball up and threw it down the hallway. Cleo was 3/4 of the way down when it landed right on her back and balanced there! She knew it had landed somewhere. One quick turn and it fell off. She was mighty surprised to have a delayed landing for sure. She grabbed at it and lost it twice...Once again, she came galloping back to me, happy as can be. It
landed on her head, her butt, off to one side and she was so busy watching "up" that she didn't see it one time I gave it a mighty roll and it stopped under her tummy as she was waiting to see it land.

 

This is Cleo waiting for Simone to stop 'hiding' under the bed. Little did she know that Simone wasn't there.

                                 

                                 Simone, my Attack Cat, happily ignoring me

Carriage Tales # ?

 2/4/22

 In the time I had my carriage business up n' running, many times things went off without a 'hitch'...(hahaha) Then there were times when they just wouldn't, no matter what.

I got a call one time from a gentleman who wanted to hire us for his daughter's wedding. It was supposed to be a surprise to both the bride-to-be and her fiancé. We got all things settled and paid for and since it was just in a week, I began cleaning. Carriages don't stay clean nor do horses. The dad's horse of choice was Dixie... since they were 'black'- he knew that his daughter would be thrilled to have a black horse take them to the church. I thought it was a marvelous choice as most times brides want a 'white' horse. We arrived on time- looking almost brand new, and sparkly.  I pulled right up to the end of the driveway and waited. And waited... and waited. My co-pilot wondered out loud if I'd written the address down correctly. I was positive I was right because it had been put on the contract also. (And I always made sure to have the correct one with me)

 It must have been a good 20 minutes before we saw a sign of life inside that little house. It was the dad coming out to greet us. At about the same time, he got to the carriage, and a very swanky Limo pulled up behind us... Hmmmm. The driver got out - oh wow, in a tuxedo also, and asked if the bride was ready?

Dad looked very confused and rushed off into the house. As we chatted with the driver, we learned that the bride's mom had hired him to deliver her daughter to the church as well.  

Oh, dear.

We waited patiently and wondered how in the heck this would get solved, plus it was getting closer to 3PM- wedding time. Mom AND Dad rushed out of the house yelling at each other about the bit of disaster while I tried my best to hide. They didn't know ' just WHAT to Dooooo" about it all. Both had been paid and were there, ready to accomplish the job and none of us was about to volunteer for a solution. That was up to the parents...

All of a sudden, in a flurry of silk, georgette, mile-long veil, and sparkles, the bride appears. She stopped and began laughing.  Seems she had TWO methods to help her get to "the church on time" She was laughing so hard; we began to wonder if she'd finally lost her marbles over it all. She walks up to Dixie (remember her?) and rubs her forehead, telling her how beautiful she is, and then back to us. She asked- before either Dad or Mom could explain- just what was going on. I explained and ended with "Here we are".  Then she walked back to the Limo driver and talked with him for a few minutes. She ended by chatting with her parents. Once all was understood- that both Dad AND Mom had secret surprises but failed to let each other know, she announced that because we had taken the time to get a beautiful black horse, and she'd ridden in Limos before, that our carriage would be her choice. Also- because it was her parents who didn't communicate well, would the Limo driver be willing to come to their reception as an apology?  He happily nodded that it all would be fine with him.

The rest of the bridal party had shown up by then, and everyone climbed into the carriage with the bride being last. Well, it turns out she had wanted a 'southern plantation' sort of wedding. The giant gorgeous hat, frilly white dress, (that was Gorgeous by the way!), long white gloves, and oh sheeesh- hoops.

When she got her veil gathered up and, on her lap, and when she sat down?  Let's just say those hoops in her dress worked well in holding it up and out. The bridesmaids etc started laughing so hard and we didn't quite know what to do. My copilot quickly turned around as he realized it wasn't smart to keep looking at the undersides of a hooped wedding gown.

At this point, with all the craziness, Dixie was more than ready to get moving and was prancing in place. I handed the lines over, climbed down from the box seat, and went back to the bride. By now, she wasn't seeing this as funny as before. I told her that those hoops were bendable and if her sisters (Bridesmaids) would kind of hold the hoops down, all would be fantastic.  I had no idea if it'd work or not, but at this point, it just had to.

The hoops were squished down, her sisters held them down by holding the bottom of her gown, and off we went. The traffic police had waited for us, thank goodness, and we crossed the 4-lane highway safely.  Our bride was back to being happy again, waving at the people in the cars, laughing with her sisters and her dad. Life was grand once again.

We arrived at the church steps 35 minutes late but you know what? It was fine with everyone. They dashed up those steps to the front double doors, but before she left, the bride took the time to come thank us for being so patient and wonderful. She threw that mile-long veil over her shoulder and dashed off to be married. Just a few minutes afterward? That beautiful swanky Limo pulled in, parked and the driver came over to see how it all went.  I just smiled and said it had gone perfectly!

Carriage Tales...

 1.22.22

 Hmmm, check out those Twos!

Once upon a time, there was a fella who wanted to ask his girl to marry him... He thought and thought. All of a sudden, he thought- A Carriage! What would be more beautiful than a white carriage pulled by a gorgeous horse? Talk about romance!

 That's where we came in...

He called and luckily, I had just had a cancelation for the day he had in mind. Yes- we could do this romantic proposal ride... We were supposed to be at the spot a little early so when he and his girl showed up, there we'd be. Oh, did I mention- this was a total surprise for her? So, I scrubbed a very dirty Percheron mare until she was pure white again, and cleaned the carriage until it was pure white too. We arrived, got hitched up, and waited only for a couple of minutes when he drove up & parked. They walked over and introduced themselves. Of course, we already had met, but she didn't know that. 

The fellow asked if we were able to give them a ride and I said that most likely we could. Well, the girlfriend didn't see any reason to go for a ride in a carriage along a bumpy road. He tried to convince her to go for a short ride- and what better way to see the countryside than from a carriage? It was hot as Hades that day and I was beginning to wonder if this was going to work out at all. (I wanted to turn around and say " just get yourself in this carriage, child! He wants to ask a very important question" but I didn't... I just smiled. A Lot)

Finally, I said to them- we'll just go to the end of the old road, and come back... that's about all we can do.  < crossing my fingers>

''Sighhhhhh''   '' alright- since you're here and all'' and they got into the carriage. We had already made sure the entrance gate would be opened for us to drive through, and off we went.

It was so cool in the woods- shady with a nice breeze blowing... I was enjoying this drive immensely. My mare was too, I think. We turned a corner and drove through a long field and it was so quiet and wonderful. I asked my mare to trot up a hill and across that field with waist-high grasses growing. She shook her huge neck and off we went. I do believe that the girlfriend was having a good time- I could hear her laughing as we began that trot.

We arrived at the area near the river and what a view it was! The white sails of sailboats, speed boats, and the giant yachts on the river that day made for a lovely backdrop. 

Driving around the last corner, the grassy fields opened to a yard-like setting. Tables had been set up with white and purple tablecloths and chairs to sit on. Crystal goblets for wine or champagne, and oh, it looked so beautiful.

 We drove around the tables and stopped on the other side. The couple got out and thanked us for a wonderful ride. We pulled around to where it was shady and waited. They greeted their guests (who had done a grand job in pulling their part off in secret) and then they walked over to a table. The girlfriend was mystified and kept asking what the heck was going on!?  

That's when "our fella" got down on one knee, handed her a rose, and asked her to be his wife. I thought she might pass out, but she didn't. Her hands flew to her mouth in surprise and in tears, she called out loudly

 "YES, I WILL MARRY YOU!!!" Everyone began clapping and cheering, and champagne bottle corks began popping. There were enough tables for their family and friends to sit down and enjoy a cold drink, and some tidbits of snacks.

"Our fella" came over with a smile so wide, I thought a person couldn't smile any wider. He thanked us heartily for our help and handed me an envelope with a card in it. I tucked it in my coat and thanked him. Wishing them both a very long happy life and off we drove. The drive back was as great as the drive out and I think that heated August day made us all a little more tired than normal. My mare got a good rinse to make her comfortable once we were home, we fed the rest of the horses and headed towards a cool house for the rest of the evening. What a perfect way to end the day! It was then I remembered the card in my pocket... It was an invitation to their wedding (on a day to 'be announced') and a crisp one-hundred-dollar bill. That even made the day absolutely Perfect for us too. :)

Carriage Tales

1.21.22

Since it is chilly and sometimes downright cold, I thought of some stories of my days running a small carriage business.

I know... right off, some are thinking how 'cruel' I am- forcing my horses to work hard, pulling a heavy carriage all day long.  I can tell you right now, to just stop thinking that way. In no way are my personal horses being "abused", mistreated, or forced to do much of anything.  My horses were only asked to "work" 4 hours total and possibly even less when considering the weather. They were clean, well-cared for, and never ever 'forced'. I often wondered how one could 'force' a one-ton animal that said NO.

Ever since I first began thinking and learning about how to teach a horse properly, it's been an ongoing study of the equine mind. At the few horse businesses, I have owned and managed, I have always "trained the brain''. It's so simple. Teach the horse so it understands what is wanted, answer all of the questions a horse might have, and allow it to relax enough to absorb all that is required. Granted there ARE some horses I have had to deal with that had some severe mental troubles, thanks to being mishandled or whatever humans may have done to it before we met. That's when we would go back to before pre-kindergarten for horses, and begin again. That is what takes time as one has to be able to correct all of the fears, confusion, misunderstanding, and hysteria inside an equine mind.

 A bit of history:

Anyhow, back to the subject of the day. (See how easily I get off on other thoughts?  lol)  

 I have been driving since early 1989 and fell in love with the sport. Sadly, the horses I owned at the time were too heavy to do a whole lot. When one's chosen partner weighs in at easily one ton, it's difficult to expect them to gallop or canter for miles on end. The Heavy/Draft horses have a rotten cooling system and subsequently will overheat easily. I wasn't willing to risk that.

Both of my Percheron mares enjoyed learning new things that I thought perhaps combined driving might be fun. Dressage and cones, sure... but those marathon courses were a bit much on a hot/humid August day. We sure had fun giving that a try and I learned a lot about it all.

Enter Carriage driving- we were asked to come 'deliver Santa' in our hometown one Christmas- actually the day after Thanksgiving. We said sure- it'd be fun- and hurried to buy a safe/sound carriage. We found one, and both mares were wonderful.

We were hired to deliver Santa to many towns close by and I think those were my favorite evenings. One year, we were asked to pick Santa up, drive along a river road, drop him off, wait till the "Christmas Ceremony" was concluded, and then give him a ride to the Santa House in town. This was not a problem- my girls and I had done the drive a few times- and we knew that the town was very responsible for keeping us safe.

 We arrived early and were set to roll - but where was Santa? (I used to tell kids that I personally knew Santa and hoped that they were all being as good as they could be.)  I was getting a little concerned that we were going to have to arrive with a 'non-Santa'... but he arrived in a town police car, thank goodness.

I was driving my smaller mare, Kara. She was so steady and easygoing. Nothing kept her from doing her 'job'.  We got Santa in the carriage as he was a little unsteady on his feet. Oddly enough, our Santa smelled a bit like whiskey... Sitting was probably a wise option.

There we were, Kara, myself, and Santa rolling along when all of a sudden, he began Yelling " HO, HO, HOOOOO"!!!!  I mean- YELLING. Of course, upon hearing "HO"- Kara immediately put on the brakes, stopped the carriage, and waited. Her head was up high, ears pointed backward, waiting to hear the "walk-on" words. I asked Santa to sit down when the carriage was moving as I didn't want him to possibly fall out. Luckily, he did- but the minute he noticed kids running across the grassy area, once again: " Ho, Ho HO!!!!"   Immediately, like a good horse, Kara slams on the brakes and stands. At this point, I'm laughing at the whole thing. Kara knows all too well that the sound " HO" means to stop and stand... Santa obviously had no clue and being slightly drunk, decided he'd better yell his Santa greeting to everyone. 

I think it took us about 15 minutes to make a 5-minute drive to our drop-off place but we got there. Someone was there to guide Santa to the tree-lighting ceremony. I asked my then-husband to hold the lines for a few minutes while I got off the carriage. I walked to Kara's head and told her what a wonderful mare she was being but she really didn't have to obey Everyone ... only me.  Of course, she had no idea but I hoped she'd at least try to understand. 

In the meantime, Santa's ceremony was over, and off we went to the Santa House in the middle of town. We got there with no more yelling ho ho ho from the back of the carriage and we decided that perhaps Santas' ummmm....  loudness had slowed down as the whiskey wore off?  As we pulled into the parking slot saved for us, once again, a standing Santa was busily yelling his favorite phrase and waving. This time, fortunately, he was holding on. Kara had learned in a short drive to not pay attention to some human behind her screaming that "stop/stand" word, and it was all good. I think we ALL had a marvelous time that evening.

Below is not the exact Santa ride but you can get the idea!

 

Being single?

12.15.21

  Well, it is Official!  I am legally divorced.  It's been long enough coming but finally, at long last, I'm single again.  Yes- I'm OLD too... How on earth does one DO this thing again??

  This is something I never thought I'd be saying again but here I am:  single. Do I like this feeling?  After a few days of living with it, I am Liking this Just Fine.

I'm my own boss once again, I can come and go as I please ( without fear of being questioned about where I'm going, who I'm going to talk to, and so many others-- Ugh) Happily, I haven't a problem living alone. There are some women who quite simply cannot. Having always been alright with it, there wasn't a problem this time.

 Sure, there were SO SO Many hangups I had to work through, face and put them aside. I had a lot of anger to face head-on too. All remnants of a marriage that really hadn't shouldn’t have happened. If I had been thinking clearly, there wouldn't have been one at all. We tried hard to get along but it just was not meant to be. Emotional and mental abuse was rampant and it seemed to be a competition of sorts. Who could be the most wicked and hurtful?

Would I, if I could, do it over again? No freaking way in hell. Many life lessons were learned by me. I can't speak for the ex-spouse.  I learned what I would never tolerate in my life again, and how to speak up more clearly. Those are a couple of things I come up with now- but believe me, there are many more lessons learned.

Do I like being divorced again? Not sure on that one. I do like being single though. Over the months, I have met some great men, but no one special. All fun, intelligent and enjoyable- but no, no one serious.

One day right before Thanksgiving, I was thinking of how it would be grand fun to know someone close by. One that I could easily call and say- 'how about a movie?'   With no strings attached...  I jumped into the dating scene with both feet. Decided to try that Match.com group. 

Holy moly! Men showed up like crazy!! Some were totally scammers, pretending to be looking for Ms, Right. HAHAHAAAA!   Been there, bozos. Many just got tossed in the proverbial garbage can. Then one or two sounded like real nice guys. We corresponded some and got along alright....but. No sparks. The phrase " hope we can be friends?"  became my motto.  

  Then out of the blue, a man showed up in my inbox - he was nice looking and had the most gorgeous brown eyes I'd seen in a long time. We chatted on the site when he wanted my phone # so we could chat that way. I thought - that'd be fine. We exchanged phone numbers and so it went. He joined the social media group so we could chat that way too.

 For the ladies here are the stats:  he's taller than I am (whew), younger than I am, German, and omg, that accent!! He is an engineer ( owns his own company) and from what I can tell from little we have talked about it- very talented in all the things that go into this. Let's seeee- what else. He had a wonderful relationship w/ his parents, has a daughter, divorced and we hit it off. The meeting is in the near future - and yes, I know all too well about being so very careful in this. 

 With this bit of excitement added in, life is getting better and better. It is so nice to have found ME again. A better version of the "me" that was around 20 years ago. I am looking forward to whatever the future brings me, Cleo, Simone and Briana. I think we're all happier now after the hell we went thru.

                                    Looking forward and walking forward!

Christmas Memories :)

 12.15.20

I still celebrate Christmas as I grew up with it all around me. I love the holidays so much!

This time of the year, I think of the past and all the good things that have happened during my life.

One that came to mind just now was of me and my MoM in the Episcopal church during a midnight eve service and singing songs that are so well remembered...

We were singing with the others in the church... "The First Noel"

My MoM turned to look at me, and she had tears in her eyes... we held hands and sang that whole song for just each other that cold Christmas Eve so many years ago.

*********************************************************************************

The Christmas Pony

I easily can recall the best Christmas I had. I was ohhhhh...10 or 11, I think. I'm not entirely sure but it was one heck of a wonderful holiday for this horse-crazy little girl.

For as long as I can remember, " a horse'' was always at the top of my Christmas lists. It didn't matter what kind, what color, or anything. A horse is all that mattered. Ponies? No- A Horse.

That year, my mom had been rear-ended on her way home from work. Had she not remembered that big sheet of plywood she was bringing home, she would have been killed. The guy who loaded it for her said it would be okay loose, as she was heading directly home.

Wouldn't you know it? That was when someone pulled out in front of her and she had to slam on the brakes. That's when the sheet of plywood went flying. Thank the gods, she had the forethought to lay down in the seat and it went over the top of her. The car behind her hit the rear end of the Rambler we had at the time. (at least that's what I remember about it- my older siblings would remember it all much better) Other than bumps and bruises, she was alright... The car didn't fare as well though.......

My parents had some friends who had a kazillion kids and we were all good pals. There would be afternoon visits with the grown-ups talking and the kids would have a great afternoon playing around their farm. There must have been a least 100 kids,or so it seemed.. there was always someone to play tag with or to climb trees or play in the hay-mow...

OR-- To pet their ponies!! That's where I would be during each visit... looking over the fencing those ponies. Dreaming of how much fun it would be to gallop across those big fields. Every time, we all came home dirty, dusty and totally worn out.

One year we took a drive to visit the Clanton family and again- it was a total blast. This time, however, two of the girls got one pony from the pasture and asked if I wanted to ride? Me??? Of Course I Would. I was told that this pony was just being trained and didn't know a whole lot so I had to be patient with him; that he was just 3 yrs old. I was and we got along pretty good, but that he sure had his own ideas of how a pony ride should go... and they were not in my list of how a pony ride should go for a ride. I fell off and everyone was laughing as this pony stopped to look at me on the ground in complete surprise. I dusted myself off, got the reins again, and clamored back on. Off we went once more and this time I had learned his tricks. It was a better ride this time and I was in love w/ this little pony.

On our way home, we all were still finding hay or straw in our clothing or shoes when my mom asked me what I thought of the pony I'd ridden.

"How does she know I rode a pony???" I thought... I said that it was okay. After So many horses belonging to someone else and no chance of Me ever owning one, I'd learned to not get very excited over it all.

My dad drove along in silence, and then she said

"Merry Christmas''

Why? It was only the middle of December. We all looked at each other wondering what was going on. That's when my mom told me that the pony was my Christmas gift and he would be arriving a couple of days after Christmas.

All of this was hard to believe for a little girl who knew there was no chance of her actually owning her own horse. We were very poor back then and it was tough to make ends meet, without having another mouth to feed. Eventually, on the ride home, I was thinking how much fun my own pony could be. We could ride through the trails all thru the forest, go visit friends and do many more wonderful things. By the time we got to our house, I had already dreamed up the perfect barn for him to live in and brushing him until his coat shined like silver.

Turns out that buying Dusty took all of the money my mom had gotten from the insurance company payment... The rest was up to me. I had to save money for a bridle and saddle. They said they would be able to buy feed/hay and straw for him, but nothing more. < sigh>

That knowledge didn't bother me much as I knew there were ways I could make enough money to buy a saddle or bridle. It would take me a while, but I could do it.

Oh my, did the days drag byyyyyy.... Christmas was a splendid day with fresh turkey and all the trimmings plus all of the gifts we got from our parents and "Santa Claus" I think we all went to bed feeling very lucky and loved.

Finally, it was time for Dusty to Arrive!! My horse-crazy neighbor had given me some of her old brushes and an old towel for wiping his eyes or nose, plus to get the dust from his coat. She and my mom had been friends ever since they were children and I think she enjoyed knowing a kid who loved horses as she did.

An old panel van came up the drive and stopped. I knew it was a pony delivery but WHERE was the pony?? The middle door slid open and there was my pony- he had ridden in between the front and middle seats the whole way to our house. I was pretty well speechless when he jumped out and walked up to me. The kids said that they had purchased a new halter and lead for me because they knew I wouldn't have any. It was so kind of them and I gave them all big hugs.

As they drove off, I realized that it was All up to me now. My dad and I had gone pony shopping and I'd bought a new pitchfork, a rake, and another lead I think, plus another brush. I had very little savings but had the best time shopping for "my pony". My dad even told the cashier that I was shopping because I had a new pony to care for. She told me to wait right there and came back with a little dish to give him food in. Free!

She said she was a horse person also and wished me the very best with him.

That was the beginning of a long and interesting love affair that sometimes was a very unhappy one. I grew like crazy but Dusty didn't. He had a lot of tricks he had not let me know about and I was able to teach him some cute tricks. He would perform them Only if there was food involved or he just felt like humoring me.

I loved him so much even so, and he taught me many things I never would have learned had it not been being owned by a "pony".

The pony below is Not Dusty but they looked so much alike I thought to share Eli's photo here :)

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Christmas Memories

As many of you who follow along here know that I owned a small carriage business. One year, we were asked to come to a nearby town for rides during their town had its Christmas celebration. All the stores stayed open late and there were carolers strolling along the sidewalks, delicious mugs of hot chocolate and muffins were available and the lights.. Oh, those lights!! All sparkling and looking so gorgeous in the misty rain. The whole world seemed to be sparkling for that evening. Lynn and I were having a great time giving rides, and I swear my mare was smiling all the time too. Turns out Lynna LOVES fresh oat muffins! Everyone must have heard about the big white horse that loves muffins, because everyone who came to ride, had a muffin.... Hahaha- I had to ask if I could 'save' them for her barn friends, which worked well. It stopped my mare from getting an upset tummy and also that a one-ton lovely stopped mooching from anyone that walked by... I slipped each one into my basket that I tried to have with us every time.

There were families, friends, couples a whole assortment of people who wanted a ride. We had already been paid by the town so the rides were free. We still got tips though which was wonderful. At first, I tried to tell folks that we had already been paid, but still, I was handed money because, well, my mare & I did such a good job in spreading that "Christmas" joy. It sure wasn't hard because the holiday was and still is my favorite one.

Towards the end of our evening, things had become a little quiet as people were heading home. Lynn was relaxing while still hitched- she would actually doze! Her ears would flop out sideways, and her head would drop almost to the pavement. I knew she was taking a much-needed 'power nap' and I let her.

There was one little guy who had hung around most of the night- standing back away from us, but still there. I noticed him again during that last hour, standing on the outskirts of where we stood. I waved to him and he waved back, smiling. He wasn't all dressed up as the other kids had been; I figured he was living nearby and didn't see a reason to be all dressed up.

It looked like there wouldn't be any more people wanting a ride, so I waved him over. He came walking carefully and told me he knew he had to be quiet around a horse. That his grandpop had told him that. We chatted for a little bit and he kept looking at my carriage all decorated for the season.

" That sure is a beautiful wagon, ma'am" he said. I told him it was a 'carriage' and one could tell because it had seats in it for people to sit in. He nodded at this information.

" Sure is purty....... and that horse! It's so BIG!"

We talked about what breed Lynna was and I explained a little about her harness, and some other stuff. He was so full of questions!

He asked if he could touch Lynn- he looked at her like he'd never ever seen anything so wonderful. I told him- why not do one better?? He looked at me in surprise... ' What is that, ma'am?'

“ Climb up here and sit beside me in 'the box seat'. “

His eyes got so big, I figured he was speechless at hearing this. Once he heard how to make the climb, he clambered up and plopped himself down next to me. Again- ear to ear grins on his face. I told Lynn to 'walk on'- but she was already asking if she could go. I thought for a second he was going to fall off the seat! And those questions continued- how tall is she? What does she weigh? What does she eat? How long can she walk? What's her last name and more. Did she have any children? Ohhhh that little guy was full of them.

He started to tell me about him and once started, there was no stopping. His mom had died when he was small ( he was just 9 yrs old) and his dad was sick, so he lived with his nanny and grandpop. Then his grandpop had died in the Autumn- I thought to myself that this little boy had handled more in his 9 years than many adults had in their whole life.

I told him that when people die- I always thought that they went to heaven and see all of those stars up there? That's how they see us down here on earth. He was dead silent with that. " Really??? My mama and grandpop are up there, looking at me right now??" 

" REALLY."

'Yep, that's what I think', I said... He took all of this information in and must have pondered it - he was so quiet.

" ok- so if they can see me, why can't I see them?"

(oh my.)

"Because the stars are so far away, that they won't show up when we look... but they can see us. I talk to my friend all the time when there are stars showing"

Hmmmmm........

I told him when he feels lonely or sad, all he has to do is look out his window and wave at them. They'll see him. That created a smile... and he shyly waved at the sky

" Hi Mama and grandpop. I hope you can see me really well up here in this big Carriage. I have been having the best time tonight and I want to be a carriage man when I grow up"

" I guess that's all , but I love you both and Nanny does too and so does daddy"

I was driving along, teary-eyed over this great little fella. He looked at me and grinned, tears in his eyes also. I handed him the lines and told Lynn to walk on. He held those lines like a little pro- and even turned her on the correct street to come back to where we were supposed to be. I don't think a little face could smile any bigger. Naturally, my mare was perfection that night for my littlest driver ever.

We both got big hugs from him and he was still smiling as he ran off down the street calling

" Merry Merry Christmas to you, lady!!!!"